Am I Missing Something?

March 27, 2013

So an Army chaplain acquaintance of mine posed a question I too have been wondering. Thanks to Dictionary.com I have the definitions in question. But sadly, no answers.

dis·a·gree /ˌdɪsəˈgri/ Show Spelled [dis-uh-gree] Show IPA

verb (used without object), dis·a·greed, dis·a·gree·ing.

1. to fail to agree; differ: The conclusions disagree with the facts. The theories disagree in their basic premises.
2. to differ in opinion; dissent: Three of the judges disagreed with the verdict.
3. to quarrel: They disagreed violently and parted company.
4. to cause physical discomfort or ill effect (usually followed by with ): The oysters disagreed with her. Cold weather disagrees with me.

Origin:  1425–75; late Middle English < Anglo-French, Middle French desagreer. See dis-1 , agree


1   /ˈkwɔrəl, ˈkwɒr-/  Show Spelled [kwawr-uhl, kwor-]  Show IPA  noun, verb, quar·reled, quar·rel·ing or ( especially British  ) quar·relled, quar·rel·ling.noun

1. an angry dispute or altercation; a disagreement marked by a temporary or permanent break in friendly relations.

2. a cause of dispute, complaint, or hostile feeling: She has no quarrel with her present salary.

verb (used without object)

3. to disagree angrily; squabble; wrangle.

4. to end a friendship as a result of a disagreement.

5. to make a complaint; find fault.

OK, but can anyone tell me if they see the word hate in either definition? I think hate is one of those overused and incorrectly used words thrown out there like love, fair and fairness, bragging, rights, entitlements. What is the inconceivable phrase from Princess Bride? “I do not think it means what you think it means.” We are so quick to say “I hate oysters because they disagree with my stomach.” Really? You hate them? Isn’t that extreme? Perhaps this is yet another example the ravages of time on the English language as we become stupider and more dependent on technology. We have no idea what we’re saying but we’ll sure throw out words if they harm, inflicts damage, and batter anyone not in agreement with us to suit our own purposes.

So what is the definition of hate?


/heɪt/ Show Spelled [heyt] Show IPA verb, hat·ed, hat·ing, noun

verb (used with object)

1. to dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward; detest: to hate the enemy; to hate bigotry.
2. to be unwilling; dislike: I hate to do it.
verb (used without object)

3. to feel intense dislike, or extreme aversion or hostility.

4. intense dislike; extreme aversion or hostility.
5. the object of extreme aversion or hostility.

Origin:  before 900; Middle English hat ( i ) en, Old English hatian (v.); cognate with Dutch haten, Old Norse hata, Gothic hatan, German hassen

Related forms

hat·er, noun
self-hate, noun
un·hat·ed, adjective
un·hat·ing, adjective
un·hat·ing·ly, adverb
Synonyms 1. loathe, execrate; despise. Hate, abhor, detest, abominate imply feeling intense dislike or aversion toward something. Hate the simple and general word, suggests passionate dislike and a feeling of enmity: to hate autocracy. Abhor expresses a deep-rooted horror and a sense of repugnance or complete rejection: to abhor cruelty; Nature abhors a vacuum. Detest implies intense, even vehement, dislike and antipathy, besides a sense of disdain: to detest a combination of ignorance and arrogance. Abominate expresses a strong feeling of disgust and repulsion toward something thought of as unworthy, unlucky, or the like: to abominate treachery.
I’m not sure I read neither disagree nor quarrel in that definition or list of synonyms. One might say, especially in the case of quarrel definition #1, that hateful things can occur to cause a break in the relationship but quarrelling itself doesn’t appear to be synonymous with hate. Or am I just missing it?

Anyone hate me yet?

One comment

  1. Nope – not missing it. I am working very hard to teach my children not to use the word hate. Dislike, yes. A child should be allowed to dislike something, but hate is too strong a word. There *is* a difference between the two, and I very much want them to understand that. Of course, this also means that I have to watch what I say as well, since children repeat what they hear. 🙂 I think I will share this with my oldest – especially since you provide the dictionary listings, he can’t give me the argument that he won’t go look things up! 🙂

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