Only 5 minutes to write…December 23, 2012
Then I’m off to take the girls to my in-laws and I will get to any last-minute shopping.
So yesterday’s post … keeping busy has its drawbacks. That constant roller coaster of gearing up for one party, the event, then the let down (not in a disappointment sence but in the relaxation of the body afterwards). It can be tough. Especially if you suffer from depression or are an introvert (or BOTH!).
So what do you do about certain events that were designed to be for the adults but you have kids and dad is at sea or MIA? A long time ago my in-laws used to host the annual church party. If I was going, I was bringing my girls. I mean, come on? I’m going to get a sitter when the party is at their grandparents? I hate to say it but some did complain especially when they got past the adorable toddler stage. But it was their house for all purposes (both my in-laws’ and my girls’). Sitters are expensive and to have to get a sitter when one is already cash strapped is harder. Eventually we started asking some of the teens to come and sit for my girls and any other children and they were entertained in the basement apartment. We changed people’s minds and no one complained any more (that I know of).
So when we moved and I came to a different congregation I was back to square one with the whole “adults only” thing. It was compounded by the fact if a children’s party was announced, almost all the of the parents felt it was a time to get 2 and half hours of free babysitting instead of staying with their children and helping and getting to know the other parents.
I guess I’ve let some uncomfortable situations get in the way. I don’t go to Ladies Class any more–none of the young mothers or mothers that don’t work do. There is such a great divide in ages. There was a ladies ornament exchange party last night and when asked if I was going I said–I have the girls because the Chief is at sea. This morning I was told someone else had brought her daughters, both younger than mine. “You should have come! No one would have minded!”
Should I have gone? Would it have been just one more thing to drag the girls to? Was I partied out? The girls and I enjoyed watching Barbie’s Nutcracker together, making hot chocolate with peppermint marshmallows and a dash of my mom’s eggnog to cool it off. In this case, letting them socialize with older women from church would have been a good example. I just don’t know.
There is a new Ladies Class that is meeting on Saturdays–for the younger working women of the congregation. Perhaps the age divide won’t be so great. I guess there are a few things I need to let go of and start setting a better example for my girls. It is interesting that perviously our entire social life revolved around church and we had very little in the way of “worldly” friends. Now, with all the children’s activities, some of my best friends–all in fact–come from those activities even if our children no longer get along or have moved on to other things. There is value in fellowshiping with those people–setting a good example, being the “salt of the earth” … but it is also important to “lift one another up” and get a spiritual recharge as well.
So the pendulum has swung to both extremes and now I need to find a middle ground and get back to basics. As busy as we are I need to show the children, who are just as introverted as the Chief and me, that we need to pace ourselves and make sure we balancing our fellowship and spiritual connections.
Ooops… wrote for 15 minutes. Better get on the road!